My own version of New Year’s resolutions:
“You play to win the game” Herm Edwards
I no longer will believe Bill Belichick when he says December games are important and that how you finish the regular season is a portent for playoff success. He taught me this year that it is okay as a professional coach to take the last six games off, fritter away possessions in the last two minutes of a half, show indifference toward clock management and that it is a good strategy to not try against Miami but still put your franchise quarterback in to get mauled behind a makeshift offensive line while conceding the game anyway.
I’m Mad as Hell and sometimes won’t take it anymore
I will stop trying to figure out the behavior of teams like the Atlanta Falcons. The Falcons started 5-0, then dropped seven of nine while giving new meaning to playing down to their level of competition with their lone wins barely beating Tennessee and Jacksonville. But two weeks after a humiliating 38-0 loss to the previously undefeated Carolina Panthers in Week 14, Atlanta played with a sense of urgency that hadn’t been seen all season and stunned Carolina. See the Falcons were mad that Carolina was mocking them by taking team pictures and selfies during the Week 14 blowout and that touched a nerve. Note to other NFL teams. No bulletin board material for Atlanta because otherwise the Falcons will mail it in.
After further review
I will stop thinking of Johnny Manziel any other way than as an independent thinker.
I won’t put down the Jets for their postgame celebration after beating the Patriots when they acted like they won the Superbowl. I also won’t laugh when they make former coach Rex Ryan happy by choking away a great chance to make the playoffs for the first time since 2010 with an awful loss to Buffalo. Incidentally, this would have been Ryan Fitzpatrick’s first ever foray into the postseason over his ten-year career.
I will stop worrying about deflated footballs and focus my attention on insignificant banners that celebrate meaningless accomplishments.
I will stop tattling on my opponents when I lose games because I am not as familiar and knowledgeable about the rules as I should be.
I will no longer support football in St. Louis. The fans couldn’t support the Cardinals and now they are being jilted by the Rams. Take the hint. Used to love Roy Green though.
I will coach the Raiders to follow the lead of the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim and become the OakAngeles Raiders.
I will not attribute Peyton Manning’s embarrassing 2015 performance to his foot injury because he was already playing poorly before the injury occurred.
I will not focus on Aaron Rodgers dependence on Jordy Nelson and his season-long injury and attribute that to the reason Green Bay looked lost on offense most of the season.
I will permanently get pumped and jacked every time I see Pete Carroll on the sideline reacting to “The Butler”
Words to the Wise
I will never use the type of escorts that Rick Pitino uses because loose lips sink ships.
I will not feed Pablo Sandoval or pamper Hanley Ramirez.
I will accept the Yankees strategy of having three shutdown closers because it takes the pressure off starters like CC Sabathia and Masahiro Tanaka who break down and now only have to go five or six innings a game.
I will plug my ears when Claude Julien gives pre-game speeches moving forward so I don’t have to hear built in excuses and a comment like our young guys need to step up and play the games of their lives to have a chance prior to the Bruins humiliating themselves on national TV at home against their arch rival. Guess his friendship with Bill Belichick isn’t paying off that much.
I will not get depressed despite the Celtics looking rudderless at 1-3 in their last four, the Bruins drifting hopelessly at 1-5 in their last six and the Patriots at 2-4 in their last six.
I will try to arrange for Greg Hardy and Roger Goodell to be transported to the same desert island.
I will not focus on Kobe Bryant being the all time missed shots leader, bickering with Shaq and costing the Lakers who knows how many more titles or his sexual assault issue in Colorado earlier in his career and instead will laud him for his five championships and the 60 million he stole from the Lakers the last two years.
I will not compare LeBron James to the Buffalo Bills as he pursues his fifth championship series loss.
I will bow at the altar of Gregg Popovich and marvel at how his team never ages and is 31-6 nipping at Golden State’s heals.
I will applaud all hockey fans for voting John Scott as the leading vote getter for the all-star game. Scott has five goals and six assists in 10 seasons. That’s the way to make a mockery of the system.
And finally, I will not defer any decisions I am awarded as a result of a coin toss.